health & anxiety

When I was 20, I was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s thyroid disease. Having a chronic health condition means having frequent visits to the doctor, blood work, medication, ultrasounds, etc. I was fortunate that my parents helped me get and maintain insurance until I was eligible for my graduate assistant plan at MSU. It wasn’t until I no longer had access to that insurance that I realized just how incredibly broken the system is. This broken system became one of the many catalysts for us to move to Korea as well as the driving force in future diagnosis of Generalized Anxiety Disorder.

By the time I finished my DMA, I also began having issues with my blood pressure and my menstrual health. Frequent tests were starting to add up, and financially, things were very volatile. We had insurance through Dean’s job, but even still I spent the year immediately after graduation avoiding going to the doctor because of how high our deductible was. It was so demoralizing being on a healthcare plan and still not being able to afford care.

In 2015, when Dean and I moved to Korea, we became eligible for the Korea’s NHIS (National Health Insurance Service). We went from a premium of over $550 per month with a deductible of $6,000 per year, to less than $100 a month plus small co-pays for medicine and doctor’s visits. Having access to this kind of care truly changed us. Our acceptance of how the healthcare system worked in the US suddenly disappeared. With the efforts to dismantle to ACA, it became even more ridiculous. This was evident once we came back to the US in 2016.

When we came back to the US, we were once again on ACA plans because we were working as contractors without benefits. We had ACA plans from 2016 until 2024 and again in 2025-early 2026. The average monthly premium for the ACA plan was between $600-$700 for the two of us with individual deductibles of $7,500. Because of these potential expenses, having a health scare that resulted in a hospital visit meant several thousand dollars in surprise expenses, which at the time, there was no way that we could afford that. I remember in 2017 while attending a funeral out of state, I had an allergic reaction to medication in the middle of the night. We had to go to the ER and that bill was over $1,500 and almost none of it was covered because it was out of network as we lived in Ohio at the time. On top of that, they also claimed that we visited specialists without prior authorization or referral, and that was simply because that was the doctor that was working the shift that night at the ER. Of course because of the speed of healthcare billing, we didn’t get these bills until months later.

The frequent anxiety associated with believing you are one poor health outcome away from financial ruin led to my first diagnosis of Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I went to the doctor with increased blood pressure and feelings of unease and I was told by the doctor that I had GAD, but more specifically Healthcare Cost Anxiety. Hearing that phrase truly took my breath away. How is it possible that I live in the US and this is something that I have to worry about?

In 2024, Dean landed a fantastic job that had incredible insurance benefits. It was one of the first times that our insurance covered the top of the line migraine medicine treatment. I can’t even explain how much of a relief it was to have it covered. Without the insurance the medicine was $1,200 a month! My anxiety symptoms improved knowing that if I needed to, I could visit the doctor and our insurance would at least protect us somewhat. We were still paying roughly $550 a month, but the deductible and co-pays were reasonable.

Then, the AI boom happened and Dean was laid off. In an instant, we lost that great insurance and were forced to once again go back to a terrible ACA plan with a high deductible, co-pays and premiums, and of course the migraine medicine that was finally available to me became unavailable once again. I started rationing my migraine medicine, saving it for migraines that were more severe than others or for dates that were really important that I was at 100%. The anxiety came back worse than ever, this time for both of us.

When we made the decision to move back to Korea, healthcare was certainly one of our reasons. Where would I rather be if a major health issue cropped up? Of course, anxiety was a driving force in that mental thought process. For me, anxiety can be completely overwhelming to my rational thoughts. When I’m in a spiral, it can become almost impossible for my thoughts not to drift to the worst-case scenario. Therapy has helped me to get a hold of those moments somewhat, but it is still something that I struggle with all of the time, especially as I get older and feel the random changes that are happening to my aging body each day.

This past month, Dean and I reached the point where we had been living in Korea for 6 months. This was the point on our visa that allowed us to join the NHIS. Things have certainly changed since 2015, but even still our premium is roughly $114 a month, with minimal co-pays. To give an example, before the insurance kicked in, I once again had issues with my menstrual cycle. I had to visit the OB/GYN to get an ultrasound and treatment plan. When they ran my information, they noticed that I didn’t have insurance and warned me that the care would be rather expensive. For a ultrasound, Dr.’s visit, hormone shot, and blood work and 3 months of birth control, the total cost was under $150. Without insurance. The last ultrasound I had while in the US was a thyroid ultrasound, and it cost me $500 out of pocket with my insurance.

This past week, after our insurance kicked in, I went to the doctor to get my thyroid and blood pressure pills refilled at the local clinic. I literally rode the bike over to the clinic without an appointment. I waited for about 30 minutes, spoke with the doctor and had my blood pressure checked and received a prescription for 3 months. The doctor’s visit cost me roughly $3.50 and 90 days of of three different pills cost $35. I will need to get my annual physical soon, so I’m sure there will be more expenses associated with that and looming in the near future is that colonoscopy, but I’m not afraid about the costs.

One thing I didn’t mention was dental care. It is partially covered by NHIS, so I went to the dentist about one week ago for a cleaning and x-rays for the first time in seven years. It cost less than $30 for the appointment.

Our decision to come back here was always because we love Korea and this is where we truly want to be, but it’s impossible to pretend that the current situation in the US wasn’t a driving force as well. Regardless, we are here, and we are so grateful that my job allowed this as a possibility.

I’ll leave today’s post with a photo of Dio and the walking trails along the river at our complex. The weather is turning cooler, so I’m looking forward to sharing more with you soon.